Next time that you think you’re having a bad day
The average cost of rehabilitate one seal after the Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively-saved animals were released into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, a killer whale ate them both.
阿拉斯加瓦尔迪兹发生石油泄漏以后，救援每只海豹的平均费用达到8万美元。在一个特别的仪式上面，有两只花巨款拯救回来的海豹，在人们的欢呼和掌声中被放回大自然。一分钟后，它们双双被一头杀人鲸吞入肚中。
In 1992, Frank Perkings in Los Angeles made an attempt on the world flagpole-sitting record. Suffering from the flu, he came 8 hours shorter than the 400-day record; his sponsor has gone bust, his girlfriend had left him and his phone and electricity had been cut off.
1992年，洛杉矶的弗兰克·帕金斯决心打破坐旗杆的世界记录。由于染上感冒，他在还差8小时破400天记录的时候下来；随后发现他的赞助人已经破产,女朋友早拂袖而去，而他的电话和电都被停了。
A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards the electrical kettle. Intending to jolt him from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking his arm in two places. Until that moment, he had been happily listening to his walkman.
一名妇女回到家中，发现丈夫在厨房里疯狂的扭动身体，腰间似乎有根电线连到电暖壶。为了救他与危难之中，她就近从后门抄了一块厚木版朝他劈去，把他的胳膊劈成两段。其实此前他一直快乐的听着随身听。
Two animal rights protesters were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughter-house in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousands of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.
波恩的两名动物权利保护者正在抗议那种送猪到屠宰场的残忍行径的时候，两千头猪突然从破篱笆里面受惊跑出，踩死了这两名倒霉的保护者。
A Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn’t pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with “return to sender” stamped on it. Forgetting it was a bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.
一名名叫凯·拉纳加的恐怖分子在邮寄邮件炸弹的时候没有付够邮资。邮件被盖上退还邮寄人的印戳退回。而他忘记了那是炸弹，于是开信，被炸成碎片。(实习编辑：夏根建)
